I’ve been waiting a month to get my name off the lease for the house I was meant to move into this Wednesday and today it was finalized. It took long enough. I guess the landlord was hoping something would change. In a strange/selfish way, he was the only one rooting for us.
I thought I’d feel happy and relieved but it just makes me sad. I daydream-decorated that place from top to bottom – a style that would be perfectly ‘ours’. I pictured backyard bbq’s and walks through my new neighborhood. I imagined my life finally starting at this house and I’m not there. I’m here. The same place I’ve been for what feels like forever. So nothing has changed and everything has changed.
But I’m not trying to make you feel sorry for me. I know how good I have it. It’s just a weedy lake swim kind of day: you’re happy to be in the water but there are long, swaying slimy things tangling around your feet.
I know, I know. Kick harder, right?
Like this:
Tags: personal shit
Or else find somewhere better to swim?
Kidding. I’m sure it must be difficult, but you’ll get through this!